JARM DEL BOCCIO, AUTHOR AND BOOK COACH
  • HOME
  • About Jarm
    • Children's Author
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
  • My Books
  • Book Coaching
    • Coaching Services
  • My Blog
  • Author Engagements
    • Author Events
    • TEACHER'S GUIDE & HEART RESOURCES
  • SUBSCRIBE

A Writerly Blog

A Much Needed Rest

3/21/2024

5 Comments

 
Fort Caswell https://fortcaswell.com/

Rest for the Weary of Heart


I came to a complete stop last week. I mean, a screeching halt. 

I was going like sixty in my writing career, doing all the things. Well, the things I thought I was supposed to be doing, or was told I needed to be doing by the wise writers of the world (WWotW). Those things included writing blog posts, newsletters, and devotions, attending writer’s conferences to pitch, network and learn (the latter I could do all day and every day, but I wouldn't have the chance to implement what I learned). And that's not to mention social media posts, and faithfully putting pen to the—I mean fingers to the keyboard. Every day! Oh, and looking for speaking engagements and creating courses and. . .

If even a couple of those things lead to furthering my career in some way (small connections, likes and comments on social media, a few reviews on Amazon, or big things like agent representation, a publishing contract or speaking engagement) I would know all my efforts were worth it. But in the last year, it's been crickets. In every case. Except one.

My top-of-the-wishlist agent asked me to do some rewrites last summer, and compile a list of 20 titles for my WIP she was interested in. She also wanted a detailed marketing plan showing all the ways I would get my book noticed, including possible speaking engagements. Although she wa sold on my book idea, her client list was full, and ultimately chose not to take me on. Now I've done the work and joined speakers groups I would never have considered.  I can honestly say in retrospect, I was grateful.

Yes. God is good. All the time.

Now, I’m thankful for all the writers (big name and small) I've come to know and follow. It's always been my policy to help them in any way I can. I share their stories, repost their images, join their launch team and review their books. And I must say, there is always growth in a small way in my writing career, but I'm not in my 30s anymore. Only God knows how many more years I have left on this earth. And I want them to matter. I want my words to leave a legacy. 
​
But I'm exhausted!!
Picture

I Need a Break!


I don't mean to be complaining (although I am). It's just that it's hard work to be an author. And I’ve been told that countless times. So it's no surprise. ‘Starving artists’ was not only a phrase used 250 years ago, but a reality today. Unless you are J.K. Rowling or Suzanne Collins, you cannot live on royalties alone. That's why many authors write courses, do school visits and are featured on podcasts.

Does that mean I want to give up?? Absolutely not!
Does it mean God is telling me to quit? I don't think so.
I know God has gifted me, so I want to be wise in using that gift.
Could it mean I need to take a rest? Yes!

And you know what? The thought occurred to me that maybe I'm taking it upon myself to market my books and find an agent without consulting my Heavenly Father. Talk about draining! Doing things in my own strength never works out for good. Especially as I age. 
Fort Caswell: Little Pier

Rest & Refresh


So, I'm going to REST and REFRESH. I'll take a break from social media posts and conferences—from feeling I need to perform—do all the things. This time, I will LISTEN—to God’s voice. I’ll ask Him what He wants me to do. I’ll wait for him to act on my behalf—to make the connections for me. ​ Just a few nights ago, when I was reflecting on my current situation, I reached out to the Almighty with tears. “Lord, what do YOU want me to do?” His answer came quite clearly (not audibly, but clearly): “Cease striving and know I am God.”  Psalm 46:10 NASB

That's it! I will rest, and let Him work on my behalf.

I'll go about my day calmer and more confident that my Heavenly Father is working behind the scenes. I will SAVOUR what He brings my way moment by moment without a heavy ‘to do’ list.  And maybe, just maybe, I smile a bit more.
The Rested Soul by Tessa Afshar

Speaking of rest, I am reading an advanced copy of The Rested Soul, and it's just what I needed. It's not your ordinary devotional. Each entry makes you stop and ponder, and I am touched with Tessa’s transparency here. You can preorder The Rested Soul today! 
Do you need a rest this season? In which area? Please let me know in the comments below so I can pray for you!
5 Comments

My word for 2024: savor

1/25/2024

0 Comments

 
Picture

Savoring Life in General


It took me longer than usual to find my word for 2024. It was a few days before the New Year when I asked God to reveal it. By the time the “ball dropped,” it came to me: SAVOR. Was it an ad for a restaurant (we do have a breakfast place by that name in Wilmington) that brought it to mind? Maybe it was a devotional. I don't remember. But what I do recall was an “ahhhhh, yes—that’s it”!

Lately, I've noticed I'm slowing down. I think it's part of the normal process of aging. I can't multi-task anymore. I have a need to accomplish my tasks one by one, not three at one time. Normally, that would stress me, but lately, I'm enjoying that ‘one thing’ I’m working on at the time. There’s a calm in my day, and a spring in my step. It's a joy to accomplish those tasks because I don't feel pressed or rushed. Partly because I've learned to space out my appointments, tasks and errands. I try not to be out around the town more than once a day—or once every two days.

Read More
0 Comments

What? No room?

12/17/2023

0 Comments

 
Picture
​And Mary said, "Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word." And the angel departed from her. Luke 1:38
Joseph and Mary began their long journey to Bethlehem with an old donkey, a basket of bread, and a flask of water. And, yes, a small bag of coins. Joseph hoped there would be enough to pay the taxes Rome required, with a small amount remaining for necessities along the way. The journey was long and arduous, extending over hills and across the river Jordan. Being close to delivering her baby, Mary found travel difficult as she bounced and joggled along on a scrawny, aging donkey. But walking would have been out of the question.

I can't even imagine what that would have been like. Creature comforts are usually taken for granted. But not for Mary and Joseph. It was a way of life. So, on with the story. . .

Read More
0 Comments

Filling our lives with things that satisfy

8/26/2023

4 Comments

 
Conference Point Camp

IS IT WORTH THE WORK? THINGS THAT SATISFY

I never would have guessed that a preschooler would teach me an important lesson about things that satisfy. This past July (and every July for the past 31 years) my hubby and I attended a family Bible Camp at Conference Point in Wisconsin. Our days were full of worship, good food, fellowship, and teaching from God’s Word. And of course there was fun in the sun— everyone’s favorite activity.

As I would rather be on the lake instead of in it, I was satisfied with a front-row seat on the beach where I could people-watch (one of my favorite activities). Kids and adults of all ages enjoyed swimming, diving, playing tag, sunbathing, and chatting. Some were floating on the surface of the water in an inflatable chair. 

However, only a subset of attendees were actually satisfied with working during their vacation, and I found that curious. It was the toddlers and preschoolers who were busy digging trenches and building forts, while the older crowd took it easy. One young girl, early on in her task, worked alongside two boys digging a long trench perpendicular to the beach. After a while, the boys got bored and left. But the girl? She soldiered on, like she was engaged in a marathon. Intent on her job, the tike journeyed to and from the lake, filling her bucket with water, pouring it into the trench and then padding back to the lake to fill it again. She must have made the trip 12 times before I lost count.

But what I did note was this: as soon as she'd turn to fetch more lake water the last bucketful would begin slowly seeping into the sand. So by the time she returned, the water had disappeared. 
Little girl filling a trench with buckets of water taken from Lake Geneva, Wi

FRUITLESS EFFORT TO SATISFY

I wondered how long it would take before she realized her efforts were fruitless—that no matter how many times she filled the trench, it would never hold water?

Well, soon after I contemplated this, she stopped at one point to examine her work, a puzzled expression forming on her face. I could just imagine her inner thoughts: “What happened to all that water? I know I poured lots in—where did it go?”

And then it happened. The realization was too much. So, with determination, she took a breath and threw the bucket on the sand, then stomped away. Ahh, the youngster finally understood. She had expended all that effort for nothing!
Picture

It was a lesson for me, too. How many times had I put energy into something I thought would satisfy, only to be disappointed? A new self-help book that will change my life. A pair of shoes with an arch the ads say will allow you to walk all day in comfort. Classic wicker furniture for our screened-in porch that will fit perfectly. A visit to a nearby tourist spot that promises good food and even better shops. 

In reality, the book is shallow and unhelpful. The shoes rub in the wrong places. The wicker furniture is too big for the spot. Most restaurants and shops in the touristy areas are closed on Sunday. 


And so on. . . 

REAL SATISFACTION

So what does satisfy? Really, only Christ can satisfy. He has made you and delights in you. He wants what's best and knows what's best for you. Pouring yourself into people and digging into and meditating on God’s Word will change your life. It will bring you peace and contentment. Here’s what the book of Isaiah has to say:
​Isaiah 58:11-12
“And the LORD will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.
And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;
you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
you shall be called the repairer of the breach,
the restorer of streets to dwell in.”
Wow! Can you think of anything more satisfying than to repair the breaches in this world? To restore relationships? To make a difference in people’s lives?

Each one of us has a sphere of influence that no one else holds. Start today—with a friend, a college student or a grandchild. Take them out for a treat. Offer to help them with a problem. Tell them they are in your prayers.

Invest in things that will last. Things that satisfy. Not stuff and meaningless activity, but people. It will renew your heart and give you a fresh perspective on life. 

​Begin today!
Can you think of one person to encourage or one ministry to engage in that will bring deep satisfaction to your soul? Let me know in the comments below. . .
4 Comments

Rain will fall: how do you handle life’s challenges?

6/25/2023

0 Comments

 
How do you handle challenging times by Jarm Del Boccio

Challenges are Sure to Come


“Into each life some rain must fall.” —Allan Roberts 

Yep, it’s true. No one goes through this world unscathed. Troubles are sure to fall like rain, whether we want them or not. So, if that’s the case, how should we respond?


​As far as I can tell, there are only three ways. (If you can think of more, please enlighten me in the comments). You can either resist them by pretending they don’t exist, fight them angrily (blaming others in the process), or accept them, letting the challenges wash over you, knowing that somehow, they will transform you into a better person. 
Leaf in the rain

Challenges Are For Our Good


​But, accepting them is not so easy, is it? We want to squirm out of them, side step them or squash them, right? If we are a child of God, though, we know He has a plan for our lives, and ultimately, our goal is to reflect our Father. ​

​Sometimes, He uses the ‘controlled burn’ to conform us. Just enough challenges to kill the wayward parts like impatience and jealousy, so new seed can grow into hardy plants that will bear a good harvest (remember the fruits of the spirit?)
Apple Orchard
Not only do trials make us more like Christ, but when we accept them and allow them to strengthen our faith, in the end, it will bring honor His name. Check out the verses below. ​. .
​1 Peter 1:6-7
So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.
Occasionally, we are the reason for the hard times. I know I have used a harsh word in the past, or avoided the truth when asked. I’ve even been jealous or critical, which leads to discontent and depression. No one sees it, of course, but Jesus does. He knows what’s in my heart. And at times, it’s not pretty—and I’m sure it makes Him sad. ​

Challenges Make Us Stronger


How many of us pray for challenges and trials? Scary idea, eh? But, consider this--we can speed up our goal of being Christ-like by putting ourselves into a situation that requires trust in our Heavenly Father. When everything is going well, why would we need to call out to Jesus?

I have done this a few times in my life. Sometimes, it’s being brave to talk with and editor or agent about my latest project. Other times it’s stepping out in faith, literally, as I walk across a mile-high swinging bridge, or climb a ladder like the one below. You see, I’m afraid of heights. But I was determined to move forward in faith. And I’m glad I did!

I’m not sure if it’s my age (I’m less intimidated), or that my desire to be conformed to Christ’s image is front and center in my heart right now. That, too, could be due to my age, since I have more years behind me that ahead of me.

This nomad journey has at times been a challenge. My time isn’t my own. Neither is my space. And don’t even talk about the issue of mail delivery when we move every few weeks. It’s a nightmare! One thing is for sure. I will appreciate our townhome So, Much. More. when our nomad life is done.

Whoa. I just thought of something. After dealing with this earthly life and our sinful nature all our lives, it will be So. Incredibly. Amazing. to finally step into Heaven and know we are FINALLY HOME and free of all that hinders us!

​How have you seen God transform your struggles into something good? Let me know in the comments below!



0 Comments

My word for 2023: flourish

12/30/2022

4 Comments

 
Picture

I'm Flourishing This Year!


It's that time again to pick a word of the year. Surprisingly, God didn't reveal it to me until a couple of weeks ago. Usually by Thanksgiving I've found it. Not so for 2023. But how could I have missed it? ‘Flourish’ is in the title of my latest non-fiction WIP: No Need to Guild the Lily: Flourishing in Your Silver Years and Beyond with Confidence & Joy.

If I'm going to write about flourishing then I should be flourishing, too, right? I need to be an example. But honestly, that's not what prompted me to choose this word for 2023. No, it was something else.

This past year, we sold our home of 30 years. But, unlike most who move directly to their new home, our townhome on the southern coast of North Carolina won't be completed until September 23rd, 2023 (I like the way that looks on the page.) In between times, we have moved 11 times, living with friends, family, traveling, and volunteering at camp and a non-profit missionary home. In each place, I have had to reorient my sense of space and place, learning to make myself at home. It's been a challenge, but believe it or not, and enjoyable one!

Remember the phrase, Bloom Where You  Are Planted? Flourish is another word for bloom. And so is:

Prosper
Grow
Succeed
Thrive

In any soil. In every circumstance. No matter what. 

Now, it takes on a different meaning. . .

Bloom Where I am Planted

Even while waiting for a table at a breakfast cafe, I try to make the best of the situation instead of being impatient. 
Picture
This is our current apartment where we volunteer as co-managers. ​I tried to make our temporary lodging as comfy as possible, even though we had very little choice in furniture and decor.
Picture
Each place we stayed I found a special mug to use for my coffee each morning. The variety was inspiring!
Picture
And how can you beat this view from a white wooden law chair where I read my Bible and prayed each morning while volunteering at Conference Point Camp? Each of the locations offered a tiny piece of joy during my stay. Each place taught me to flourish where I was planted. And God helped me to bloom.
Have you faced a time when you were offered a choice to flourish or whither? Tell me how you learned to grown in the comments below.  And Happy New Year to all my readers!
4 Comments

A Home for the Homeless

3/25/2022

0 Comments

 
Picture
Fear rises up in the pit of my gut. I'm signing away my home with no place to go. Is that wise? At least nine long months stretch out to the end of 2022 before my hubby and I will lay our heads on our own pillows in our own bed within our own new townhome. But until then?

​I am thankful for friends and family who are willing to give us a place to lay our tired bodies
for a short time as we wait for the construction crew to break ground, build a foundation for our new abode, and finally the home itself. Some weeks, we will travel, other times, we maybe rent an AirBnb. Or live in a tiny house—yay!

The Ukrainian Refugees: Fleeing Home

My thoughts immediately turned towards the heartbreakingly tragic situation in Ukraine. Now, I can't profess to know much about the situation. For more on that, click HERE for a newsletter from an author friend who lived among them and wrote two historical novels based on her research.

But, I can imagine what it would be like to leave the home you loved in exchange for the unknown. Of course, I am not being driven from my home. Nor are we fleeing. Well, maybe. Taxes and the political trajectory of our state is motivating us. Not to mention the weather. But the Ukranians have no choice. Not only when to leave or how to leave, but the choice what to take, keep or store. I'm sure they had little time to think about what to pack. Only the necessities: food, clothing, a bit of money, maybe a pet or toy for the children? Speaking of which, did you see the photo of a bridge into Poland lined with stuffed animals from the local community for the bereft children crossing the bridge to safety with their parents? If you haven't seen it, take a LOOK.
Picture
I on the other hand, have been clearing out the clutter and giving tons away. Later, we will have an estate sale. And frankly, it's a relief. The less you have, the less to lose. Less to get attached to. Less to care for. But it was my choice. The Ukranian people have no choice. Maybe owning less is a good idea?
Luke 12:22-24 He said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds!” And from what I'm hearing from refugees’ stories, God is providing in so many ways. So why am I worried about this temporary transition to our new home? He has so many ways to provide.

Something to Ponder

And Jesus said to him, “Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head.” (Matthew 8:20)

Jesus was talking about Himself! He had no place to call home. But His friends and disciples where happy to host Him. Can you imagine showing hospitality to the Son of God? Wow.

So, in a small way, I will be able to relate to Jesus in His homelessness. How much more will the Ukrainian refugees? Thankfully, there are ways to help them.
If you have a desire to aid the Ukrainian church, click on this link for Christian Ministries doing so.

What am I learning in this time of year, homeless transition?


  • ​Decluttering makes me happy. Sure, one man’s trash is another man's treasure. But having less is FREEDOM. I won't be bound by things that don't matter anymore.
  • My mind and body is aging, and as they do, having less is rejuvenating. I don't have to be overwhelmed with my possessions. I'll have more time to concentrate on the things I am able to do.
  • I can bring joy to those I offer my special things. Already, friends and family have come to take items they have admired in the past. Even our buyers are excited about starting a new life in our home. That makes me smile.
  • This world is NOT my home anyway. Heaven is. And what a place THAT will be. The book Heaven by Randy Alcorn will make you anticipate your new home with a passion.
  • God only gives us enough light for the immediate road ahead. I need to trust Him for the long haul.

What about you? Have you made a move recently? I'd love some tips on surviving during that time of upheaval. Do you have a heart for the Ukrainian people? Have you found a way to help? Let me know below!
0 Comments
<<Previous

    Good News!

    My MG Biblical fiction "The Heart Changer" debuted in 2019 with Ambassador International.
    ​
    May I inspire you?
    ​ 
    If so, sign up HERE! 


    You’ll receive news of my latest blogpost and inspiration from life and literature to bring focus into your own journey. 

    ​I love to share the quirky things I see in the world. Sometimes, it's for a laugh; at other times, to teach a lesson. Or, just maybe, it will encourage you!

    Archives

    April 2025
    January 2025
    October 2024
    September 2024
    August 2024
    July 2024
    June 2024
    May 2024
    April 2024
    March 2024
    February 2024
    January 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    September 2023
    August 2023
    July 2023
    June 2023
    May 2023
    April 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    October 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    August 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016

    Categories

    All
    Adoption
    Aging
    Amazon
    Author
    Author Endorsements
    Author Historical Sites
    Author Interviews
    Basque Country
    Book Cover Reveal
    Book Endorsements
    Bookish Things
    Book Launch
    Book Trailer
    Bucket Lists
    Charleston
    Children's Book Week
    Christmas
    Crisis
    Debut Book
    Disability
    Edie Melson
    Emotional Thesaurus
    England
    English Authors
    Faith Insights
    Fantasy Novels
    Film Insights
    Good Reads
    Gratitude
    History
    Insights
    Inspirational
    Jarm Del Boccio
    Julie Hedlund’s 12x12
    Languages
    Legacy Of Mercy
    Literary Insights
    Lynn Austin
    Media
    Memories
    Mesu Andrews
    Middle Grade Novels
    Middle-grade Novels
    Minimalism
    Mr. Roger's Neighborhood
    My Nomad Journey
    National Reading Month
    North Carolina
    North Korea
    Picture Books
    Portugal
    Rice From Heaven
    Sailing
    SC
    SCBWI
    Social Media
    Spain
    Technology
    Tessa Afshar
    The Desert
    The Heart Changer
    The Liebster Award
    The Way Home
    Tina Cho
    Travel
    Travel Writing
    Word Of The Year
    World Events
    Writer’s Block
    Writer's Conference
    Writer's Craft
    Writer’s Journey
    Writer's Retreat
    YA Novels

    RSS Feed

  • HOME
  • About Jarm
    • Children's Author
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
  • My Books
  • Book Coaching
    • Coaching Services
  • My Blog
  • Author Engagements
    • Author Events
    • TEACHER'S GUIDE & HEART RESOURCES
  • SUBSCRIBE