Rest for the Weary of HeartI came to a complete stop last week. I mean, a screeching halt. I was going like sixty in my writing career, doing all the things. Well, the things I thought I was supposed to be doing, or was told I needed to be doing by the wise writers of the world (WWotW). Those things included writing blog posts, newsletters, and devotions, attending writer’s conferences to pitch, network and learn (the latter I could do all day and every day, but I wouldn't have the chance to implement what I learned). And that's not to mention social media posts, and faithfully putting pen to the—I mean fingers to the keyboard. Every day! Oh, and looking for speaking engagements and creating courses and. . . If even a couple of those things lead to furthering my career in some way (small connections, likes and comments on social media, a few reviews on Amazon, or big things like agent representation, a publishing contract or speaking engagement) I would know all my efforts were worth it. But in the last year, it's been crickets. In every case. Except one. My top-of-the-wishlist agent asked me to do some rewrites last summer, and compile a list of 20 titles for my WIP she was interested in. She also wanted a detailed marketing plan showing all the ways I would get my book noticed, including possible speaking engagements. Although she wa sold on my book idea, her client list was full, and ultimately chose not to take me on. Now I've done the work and joined speakers groups I would never have considered. I can honestly say in retrospect, I was grateful. Yes. God is good. All the time. Now, I’m thankful for all the writers (big name and small) I've come to know and follow. It's always been my policy to help them in any way I can. I share their stories, repost their images, join their launch team and review their books. And I must say, there is always growth in a small way in my writing career, but I'm not in my 30s anymore. Only God knows how many more years I have left on this earth. And I want them to matter. I want my words to leave a legacy. But I'm exhausted!! I Need a Break!I don't mean to be complaining (although I am). It's just that it's hard work to be an author. And I’ve been told that countless times. So it's no surprise. ‘Starving artists’ was not only a phrase used 250 years ago, but a reality today. Unless you are J.K. Rowling or Suzanne Collins, you cannot live on royalties alone. That's why many authors write courses, do school visits and are featured on podcasts. Does that mean I want to give up?? Absolutely not! Does it mean God is telling me to quit? I don't think so. I know God has gifted me, so I want to be wise in using that gift. Could it mean I need to take a rest? Yes! And you know what? The thought occurred to me that maybe I'm taking it upon myself to market my books and find an agent without consulting my Heavenly Father. Talk about draining! Doing things in my own strength never works out for good. Especially as I age. Rest & RefreshSo, I'm going to REST and REFRESH. I'll take a break from social media posts and conferences—from feeling I need to perform—do all the things. This time, I will LISTEN—to God’s voice. I’ll ask Him what He wants me to do. I’ll wait for him to act on my behalf—to make the connections for me. Just a few nights ago, when I was reflecting on my current situation, I reached out to the Almighty with tears. “Lord, what do YOU want me to do?” His answer came quite clearly (not audibly, but clearly): “Cease striving and know I am God.” Psalm 46:10 NASB That's it! I will rest, and let Him work on my behalf. I'll go about my day calmer and more confident that my Heavenly Father is working behind the scenes. I will SAVOUR what He brings my way moment by moment without a heavy ‘to do’ list. And maybe, just maybe, I smile a bit more. Speaking of rest, I am reading an advanced copy of The Rested Soul, and it's just what I needed. It's not your ordinary devotional. Each entry makes you stop and ponder, and I am touched with Tessa’s transparency here. You can preorder The Rested Soul today! Do you need a rest this season? In which area? Please let me know in the comments below so I can pray for you!
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When Dreams are DashedEveryone has disappointments—dreams dashed to the ground, along with their hopes. Not fun, is it? "Why me?" you and I say. Why not? No one is immune. We live in a sinful world with sinful people. But hold on. Sometimes, our dreams are smashed not because of an evil influence or mishap, but because God is orchestrating our lives, and has a better idea. ***Please excuse the link format. For some reason, the website would not allow me to embed the links, but in retrospect, it fits with the theme of my post. Enjoy. . . This happened to me last week. I was attended the NRB modules.marriott.com/leisure/bnago-gaylord-opryland-resort-and-convention-center (National Religious Broadcasting) Convention with high hopes that I might make good connections with podcasters or radio personnel who wanted to interview me about my middle-grade biblical fiction, The Heart Changer, or my work-in-progress for silver sisters who are stuck and need help moving forward as they age. I tentatively entitled it Flourishing and Fragrant: Living Abundantly in Your Seasoned Years. I also thought I might interest one of the four publishing houses, but only one showed any promise. But, that’s one! God’s Plan is Far BetterSo, what happened?? Well, since no-one seemed interested in booking me for an interview, God nudged me to give away the 10 books I’d brought with me to a Representive at each booth featuring Israeli ministries. After all, my MC was an Israelite captive, wrenched from her home in a time of war, and forced to serve Naaman, commander of the Syrian army—well—brought to serve his wife, whom I named Adara. My desire was to bless some middle-grade Jewish/Israeli girl with a story of hope. So, although humanly speaking my dreams were smashed, God will bring a blessing from my book. While perusing the booths, I stopped at one giving samples of Beantage https://www.beantage.com/, coffee grown in Thailand. The girl was so sweet to talk about her product, then ask me why I was at the conference. When I shared my book, she suddenly became animated. I could read joy all over her face! Ruth was an educator who loved reading, and desired to have good literature put in the hands of young students. In fact, she was a budding writer herself. I immediately encouraged her to look up AWSA (Advanced Writers and Speakers Association—the organization I was with at the conference) https://awsa.com/ where she could find support. As we finished our conversation, promising to connect in the future, I walked a few booths away, and then God nudged me (again) to give her my last copy of The Heart Changer. https://ambassador-international.com/books/the-heart-changer/ She was thrilled! It brought joy to my heart to encourage another educator who desires to put good books into the hands of young students, whether by purchasing or writing them. I just had to take a photo of this God moment! Another Rude AwakeningAlthough the Gaylord Opryland in Nashville https://modules.marriott.com/leisure/bnago-gaylord-opryland-resort-and-convention-center was a gorgeous hotel with tropical gardens, high-end shops and restaurants, the floorplan left something to be desired. For someone like me who has difficulty walking up and down stairs, this was not a user-friendly environment. Even though there were elevators available, one never knew which levels were accessible. There were maps, but the atrium with its footpaths and bridges, made it a challenge to navigate. The Final StrawDreams of a smooth trip home were dashed when our first flight to Charlotte was delayed, thus making me late to my next connection, even though I walked fast, and used the moving walkway. So—I was routed via Myrtle Beach, a 1.5-hour journey from our home, where my husband met me at 10:30 pm. Oh, and did I mention my luggage didn't accompany me? Nope. It was arriving at midnight, so I told the agent I would not be waiting for it. Thankfully, they are prepared and brought to my home the next morning. Who knew? God did. And I was grateful He brought me safely home, albeit exhausted. One never can anticipate what will happen at any one time. But, I have a heavenly Father who cares, and works all things together for good. One fun note—Former President Trump was speaking at the NRB (I was not able to attend), so it was a treat to see his jet at the airport as our plane taxied out. I have a window seat passenger to thank for this photo! What about you?? Have you had your dreams dashed lately? I'd love you to share your experience below. We can't expect everything to go smoothly in this life, but, if we belong to God’s family, He will turn it around for our benefit—and others!
Savoring Life in GeneralIt took me longer than usual to find my word for 2024. It was a few days before the New Year when I asked God to reveal it. By the time the “ball dropped,” it came to me: SAVOR. Was it an ad for a restaurant (we do have a breakfast place by that name in Wilmington) that brought it to mind? Maybe it was a devotional. I don't remember. But what I do recall was an “ahhhhh, yes—that’s it”!
Lately, I've noticed I'm slowing down. I think it's part of the normal process of aging. I can't multi-task anymore. I have a need to accomplish my tasks one by one, not three at one time. Normally, that would stress me, but lately, I'm enjoying that ‘one thing’ I’m working on at the time. There’s a calm in my day, and a spring in my step. It's a joy to accomplish those tasks because I don't feel pressed or rushed. Partly because I've learned to space out my appointments, tasks and errands. I try not to be out around the town more than once a day—or once every two days. And Mary said, "Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to your word." And the angel departed from her. Luke 1:38 Joseph and Mary began their long journey to Bethlehem with an old donkey, a basket of bread, and a flask of water. And, yes, a small bag of coins. Joseph hoped there would be enough to pay the taxes Rome required, with a small amount remaining for necessities along the way. The journey was long and arduous, extending over hills and across the river Jordan. Being close to delivering her baby, Mary found travel difficult as she bounced and joggled along on a scrawny, aging donkey. But walking would have been out of the question.
I can't even imagine what that would have been like. Creature comforts are usually taken for granted. But not for Mary and Joseph. It was a way of life. So, on with the story. . . Thankful for THAT??? This year, I’m going to be grateful for all the things I didn’t get or didn’t happen as I wished. And for the prayers God answered in the negative. I’m going to thank the Lord for the hard times — the low times — that knocked the wind out of me or caused me to slip and slide. I'll be grateful for those times I would categorize as disappointments or dead ends, and for people God surrounds me with who keep me humble — those who withhold praise, give criticism, or are uncomfortable to be around.
Why, you ask? Isn’t that a bit unorthodox? Or unconventional? Yes. Well . . . No. Is Waiting a Choice?Unfortunately, you don’t choose to play the waiting game. Normally, it’s forced upon you. Some disciplined folks decide to wait in case something better comes along. Or, maybe they just want to add to their character or develop the Fruit of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-23 During our 16 month nomad journey, we’ve had to wait numerous times. Sometimes, God didn’t reveal the next camp or ministry along our way until a few days or weeks before. In one instance, it happened two weeks AFTER we were intending to move on. As we waited for our new home to be completed, the closing date was moved three times, but thankfully only two weeks at a time. In the end, we waited a total of 4 weeks longer to step foot into our townhouse as new occupants. This was the first benefit we discovered in our nomad period: you begin seeing the benefits of doing without or waiting for the desired event or object.Even though it was frustrating to tote our belongings in two cars the entire 16 months, we began to see a pattern: we were brought to the camps/organizations for ‘such a time as this’. In each instance, we were told we filled a need at just the right time. If you wait with open eyes and hearts, you will see God had a purpose in it all. In each location, it was necessary to live life a bit differently. We’ve lived in a two bedroom apartment, a double wide trailer, a cabin and lastly, a beach house. Sometimes dishes and bakeware were supplied, but other times, I would purchase items from the local Goodwill, and donate them when we left. Although each place had Wi-Fi, the cabin in the woods had internet connection only during the week, since the source (Wi-Fi portable receiver) would be given to whatever camp director was running the event that weekend. Which leads to our next point: You find other ways to navigate your situation while you wait.I learned to do most of my online author’s tasks during the week, leaving the weekend for outings with my hubby. I also worked long hours in the kitchen every other weekend, so Wi-Fi access wasn’t an issue. I also learned to brew my tea in a Yeti insulated mug and bake a small cake in a Pyrex food storage container, since I had no baking dishes. This next one was a surprise: You discover it wasn’t important to you anyway.Before we moved, it was my habit to never leave the house without earrings, perfume or makeup. If I ever walked out without any of the three (I warned my husband), you’d know something was not right. As I left the house early for my kitchen shift, I didn’t want to spend the time putting on makeup or earrings. In fact, the staff urged me to leave my wedding ring at home, since it could get caught on machinery, even while wearing gloves. So guess what? I stopped wearing any jewelry except for special occasions (like church or dinner date/field trip). Even then, I walked out of the house without it, with the exception of my wedding ring. I also cut down on my beauty routine. No more eyebrow pencil, extra moisturizer or eye shadow. Even eye liner was eliminated on a normal day. I’ve been known to go out to our mailbox in my house dress (which looks like a comfy lounger) without a shower or makeup (horrors) and be met by my soon-to-be neighbors. Wow. I’ve really loosened my standards. Which lead to this observation: You find out there was a better solution to the situation anyway, and you had time to think it through.During our waiting period, I dreamed of purchasing all kinds of gadgets and accessory furniture to organize and enhance our living space, including end tables and coffee tables. Turns out, only a few things were necessary. I thought I wanted a wooden coffee table with a top that raised to lap height as a surface for eating a meal while watching TV. Well, when I saw this square soft side foot rest that could double as a surface for a tray with drinks and appetizers, I was smitten. There was no turning back! But, it took time for me to analyze our needs. So, what was the grand assessment of of our 16 month nomad waiting journey?? You appreciate what you have waited for so much more!This one is self-explanatory. It's the best result of playing the waiting game-- GRATITUDE! What about you? Have you been caught in the waiting game? Are you at the point where you are able to see the benefits of your situation?
Please let me know in the comments below! Unexpected CreaturesIn an isolated tropical bush village in Papua New Guinea, one would expect to find creepy critters—and I did. Over 30 years ago, I went to PNG as a single missionary teacher. While there, I experienced millipedes, centipedes (the 4-6 inch kind with crablike legs), and spiders with bodies the size of golf balls (yes, you read that right). But unexpected situations in North Carolina? No way! This is the USA. With temperate weather, an idyllic coastline, gorgeous sunsets, and stunning mountain vistas, who would expect creepy crawlies?? I soon found out! My first encounter was at Hickory Cove Bible Camp in Taylorsville. It was early summer, and the day was hot, so I wore my flip-flops on my .125-mile uphill trek to the camp mailbox. It was nearing dusk, so as I walked back to our cozy doublewide, I noticed something looking like a long tube stretched across two lanes on the country road. I kept walking, and then slowed. Wait. Was that a snake?? Yikes! Was it dead? Deadly? Ready to slither across the road as I passed by? Would he try to bite me? Oh, great. What a day to wear flip-flops! I didn't ponder those questions for long. I moved steadily down the road without glancing over at the cold-blooded creature. And I survived. Later that week, I was told he was harmless and had a name: Frank or something similar. Evidently, he comes quite often to the camp, especially to the front porch of the double-wide we are staying in. What?? Snakes climb stairs??! Suddenly, I felt exposed. Unprotected. But still able to sleep at night. Until. . . We moved to Fort Caswell, just 50 minutes from our new home, where we are volunteering while we await our move-in date. It's a Baptist camp located at the end of a coastal peninsula, complete with lighthouse, and ships, ferries and fishing boats galore passing by throughout the day. Oh, and there are stunning sunsets, a wild breeze, and an array of seabirds along the shore, calling, catching prey, and sunning themselves on the dock. So, imagine how stunned I was to find a small snake laying across the threshold between the kitchen and living room in (yes, IN) our beach house (Note the pic at the top). Not knowing what it was, I immediately took a pic and asked my friends on Facebook if it was friend or foe. Turns out, it was a rat snake. Totally harmless. Well, unless, of course, you're a rat. We had a maintenance man from the camp come and find the source, after we had seen five of these snakes pop up in various rooms of the house—even on the second floor. (Yes, Mabel, it's true— they slither up stairs). He blocked up the hole with foam, and called it a day. Our relief lasted only a day or two, then three more showed up. So bizzare! To this day, we don't know how they get into our living quarters. Thankfully, they are all babies of various sizes. An Unexpected Web of IntrigueOne day, on our way to work in the cafeteria, we found this beauty just outside the back door. She graced the web like a star. I was shocked because I hadn't seen a spider that large (actual size) since my time in New Guinea. Again, I reached out to my Facebook friends, and they didn't disappoint. I was told it was a banana or orb spider, but both were harmless. I breathed a sigh of relief until one of the interns showed me a pic of a hummingbird caught in the web of one such creature; life sucked out of him and spun into a coffin to eat later. So sad. Next thing you know, she will be catching rats! Even so, I'm making peace with her. Each time we enter the back door to the kitchen, we say hello. I'm calling her Asmerelda, which seems to fit a brightly patterned spider. Hide and Seek with Ghost CrabsYou'd think, with my aversion to spiders, I would be fearful of crabs. Not so. For some reason, I consider them comical and cute. Ghost crabs are also shy, and play hide and seek in the bushes. They can be found on the beach at night, popping out of their holes in the sand. But have your flashlights ready—they move fast! Luminescent LizardsAnd last, but not least are lizards. They do not strike fear in my heart. But I have been known to strike up a conversation with one, as I did this day. Lizzie is what I called her. And no, this is not a gecko. Their head is v-shaped and a gecko’s triangular. A Creature of an Unexpected KindAlthough these foes are not alive, they are cause for concern. Sand Spurs are everywhere, so footwear is essential. It is not pleasant to step on one, and they are a challenge to pick out of rugs and shoes without sticking oneself. At least they are not poisonous, nor do they bite. Unexpected ChallengesAlthough we realize it's hurricane season, we expected to be safe inside our comfy beach house, just yards away from the Intracoastal inlet. Each day, the tide flows in and out (four times a day, evidently), but only in a tropical storm or hurricane is there danger of flooding. We are thankful God has spared us from this disaster so far. But there is another source of possible flooding: water dripping from the porch roof and onto the inside window frame. Here, you can witness our attempt at preventing pools of water in our downstairs kitchen/living room during tropical storm Ophelia. Ahh, yes. The coastal life. An Unexpected PleasureAll in all, we are thriving and even enjoying our volunteer work here at Fort Caswell. The setting is relaxing, the staff friendly and helpful, and our kitchen duties workable for our aging bodies. Plus, we have the pleasure of experiencing the hurricane season near a body of water, witnessing the effects firsthand.
God has been good to us every step of our nomad way. But more on that next month. He is teaching us to trust Him in all situations, proving once again--He is enough. Have you experienced a hurricane? What about a creature invasion? Let me know below! |
Good News!My MG Biblical fiction "The Heart Changer" debuted in 2019 with Ambassador International. Categories
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